Domestic violence, also called intimate partner violence, happens in many forms including physical, emotional and economic violence, and can affect people of any age or sex. It does not have to be within the home to be classified as domestic violence. It is a form of violence that can occur within any relationship (family, intimate partner or other intimate relationships). Domestic violence is about power and control and there are many ways this control can be expressed.
This week we came across a domestic violence story that hit close to home. MMA fighter Julian Wallace pleaded guilty this week to assaulting Jess Jessy; a well established and respected MMA Fighter whom is adored within our BJJ community and beyond.
Displaying her strength and courage, she publicly shared her story in a hope she could be of inspiration to others facing the dark and painful life of domestic violence.
We are honoured to have Jessy Jess on our Ambassador team, however she is far more than her MMA or BJJ skills, she is a truly remarkable, inspirational and courageous woman. The Fight Never Ends Jessy.
Here is her story:
See below her statement about
“I’m not entirely sure what to write…
This is something that I have struggled with being able to speak about over the last couple of months. Until my close friends and family encouraged me to be open about it in the hope of not only helping the women in this mans future, but other women men and children who are being subjected to situations like this or worse.
It has only been a few short months and one of the hardest things for me to come to terms with, is the fact that the man I was so head over heels in love with, and professed to be madly in love with me in return, could act the way he did. And I was too stupid to leave. I was too in love to leave. I truly believed things would get better.
They got worse.
It saddens me that this particular incident had to happen before I finally found the courage to leave. And it saddens me that I was still so caught in his spell, that I still went back multiple times to see him even after it happened. I still told him I loved him and I even considered trying to make it work again. 5th time is a charm right?
I am BLESSED to have had beautiful friends and my family for me to lean on whenever I was feeling tempted by his beautiful words and his sweet actions. They always reminded me of where I had come from.
I had to leave the country to break free of his spell completely.
I saw him 3 days before I left for America. He begged me to come say goodbye to him and I did. I couldn’t even look him in the eye. I had to leave.
I haven’t spoken to him or contacted him since.
I am so grateful for the support network that I had and have around me because without it, I might still be caught in that trap.
Thank you to everyone who has been there for me through every threat, every fight, every hit, every time I was made to feel like I was nothing and nobody would ever love me or want me the way he did.
The reason I came out so publicly about this is because it TERRIFIES me to think that if someone like myself, a professional fighter, can get so deeply caught in such a toxic and hurtful situation, and knowing how hard it is to break free of their hold on you, then what hope is there for the women, men and children who don’t have the physical ability to not only defend themselves but remove themselves from the situation.
I am urging everyone, PLEASE don’t ever feel like you are alone. There are people everywhere who will help you. I will help you. Msg me any time of the day or night and I will be here.
I wasn’t alone, no matter how degraded and isolated I was, I realized I was never alone.
You are not alone.” – Jessy Jess
Don’t be alone:
- 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732): 24 hour, National Sexual Assault, Family & Domestic Violence Counselling Line for any Australian who has experienced, or is at risk of, family and domestic violence and/or sexual assault.1800respect.org.au
- Reach Out: http://au.reachout.com/
- NSW – Domestic Violence line (24 hour) 1800 65 64 63 or on http://www.domesticviolence.nsw.gov.au/
- VIC – Domestic Violence Victoria line (24 hour) 1800 015 188 or on http://www.dvvic.org.au/
- QLD – Statewide Sexual Assault Helpline 1800 010 120 – 7.30am to 11.30pm, 7 days a week